The ‘F’ Word: Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a voluntary and intentional process by which you have a change in feelings and attitude regarding an offense.

The rule is simply this: forgive. This is sincerely the best thing you can do in your marriage and really the only way to keep your marriage intact for the rest of your life. It takes letting go of negative emotions such as anger or vengefulness, and the ability to wish the offender well. Studies have shown that forgiveness inspires love and can be healing in many ways.

Use these tips to keep forgiveness at the heart of your marriage:

1.      Look at both sides of the story.

There are often simple explanations for frustrating behavior, but you have to be willing to see both sides. Too often, spouses jump to conclusions and immediately go into a blaming or defensive mode instead of looking reasonably at both sides of the story. If everyone looked at themselves first before attacking their partners, many fights would be dispersed before they even began. When you can view both sides honestly, it is easier to find forgiveness because you see what part you contributed in the fight.

2.      Practice a policy of open honesty, but not necessarily all the time.

Some spouses operate on the premise that honesty is the best policy no matter the circumstances. In reality, this is not true in marriage. When you hear that honesty is important in a marriage, it is. But it doesn’t mean cruelty or lack of tact is necessary. Honesty means not lying about how much you spent shopping and if your husband asks how you are, do not say ‘fine’ when you don’t mean it. If you need to, schedule a time each week that is your ‘honest’ time. When you have both had a chance to air your grievances, it will be easier to follow number 1 above.

3.      Imagine your spouse dying or leaving you.

This isn’t something that you usually hear recommended in a marriage. But it is a simple and powerful way to remind yourself of how much you love your spouse. When you are feeling especially angry, think about how you would feel if he or she died before you sorted out your feelings. Would this incident be of importance? This is not to say that you should pretend to be happy all the time because he or she might die. This is just another way to look at your marriage and realize how much you do love each other and want the marriage to go forward.

4.      Think about how forgiving will also help you.

Holding on to negative feelings and grudges is extra emotional weight you don’t need. You have likely upset your spouse at times too. There is  no way to exist in any long term relationship without some misunderstandings and doing unintentional harm. Forgiving will be freeing for you and is likely to bring you the same in return from your partner.

 

By following these simple guidelines, you will find that you can forgive your husband or wife more quickly. Throughout your relationship, you will frequently have moments of “rupture and repair.”  There are times you both go off course and will need to correct it. This is quite normal. Love always follows forgiveness. So, put these ideas into practice to strengthen your bond and ensure that you are truly together until death do you part.

At Star Point Counseling Center, there are two convenient locations for you to choose from in Brandon and Tampa. Call or Text us today, to schedule your appointment. (813) 244.1251
 To view the Brandon website, click here.

We provide counseling services to individuals, couples, families, children, teens, and adults with any type of crises.  We help you build tools as well as help design and implement individualized goals and objectives, help you sort out beliefs, thoughts, and behavior patterns that may be hindering you in your relationship(s) whether at the work place or in other areas of your life.  
 
We have the tools you need for managing pain, anxiety, disappointment, frustration, hopelessness, or anger resulting from circumstances that interfere in achieving a balanced and fulfilling lifestyle.  By working together, we will show you how to set and achieve goals and objectives therapeutically designed to meet your needs that will allow you to live the life you know that you deserve.

 

http://www.starpointcounselingtampa.com

http://www.starpointcounselingbrandon.com

http://www.affordablecounselingbrandon.com

 

 

 

 

Therapy for Blended Families

Blended families are very common and can produce wonderful experiences as well as unique challenges.  The step parent – step child relationship can be fragile at times.  The same can be said for adoptive siblings, step siblings, and half siblings.  You may find yourself needing a family therapist.  Family counseling can help you deal with any jealousy or resentment that may be undermining the situation, and restore peace and harmony to your home.

If any of the following, fit your situation, you can benefit from family counseling.

  • Is your blended family just not blending?
  • Are you a stepmom struggling with his kids?
  • Are you a Dad struggling with parenting in a stepfamily?
  • Is your relationship not what you expected?
  • Is discipline a problem?
  • Are your step kids disrespectful?
  • Who comes first partner or the child?
  • ​​Do you sometimes feel like an outsider?

At Affordable Counseling Center, we take the time to focus on the partnership of the family and use actionable processes to address the issues of: partnership, couple strength, discipline, roles, organization, conflict of loyalties, and the ex spouse, if applicable.

Call Affordable Counseling Center today. We have offices in Brandon and Tampa and will work around your schedule. Call or text us at; (813) 244-1251. We are also online at:

http://www.affordablecounseningbrandon.com

http://www.starpointcounselingbrandon.com

http://www.starpointcounselingtampa.com

When to Seek Co-Parenting Counseling

When parents are able to create and maintain a strong parenting alliance after separation, children have a secure base to depend on while they grow. Some families are able to easily maintain a strong alliance after separation and others need support to create or regain a stable co-parenting relationship.

Through Co-Parenting Counseling you can reduce troubling symptoms and create positive change in your life. You’ll begin to identify what isn’t working and the effects these patterns are having on your relationships, mood, and productivity.

Parents seek co-parent consultation at all stages of post-separation parenting. Some parents come in before separation to explore how to separate in a way that best supports their children’s needs. Others have been co-parenting for a while and want to strengthen their co-parent alliance, improve communication and decision-making, or reduce children’s exposure to unresolved conflict.

Call or Text us at Star Point Counseling Center. We have offices in Tampa and Brandon and can work around your busy schedule. We can be reached at (813) 244-1251. We are also online at:

http://www.starpointcounselingtampa.com

http://www.starpointcounselingbrandon.com

http://www.affordablecounslingbrandon.com

 

Couples Therapy at Starpoint

Marriage counseling, also called couples therapy, is a type of psychotherapy that is conducted by licensed therapists. Usually involving both partners, marriage counseling helps couples to recognize underlying conflicts and improve their relationship. It can help married couples make thoughtful decisions, overcome differences and enhance communication between them. Marriage counseling is also an ideal resource for relationship help. Often short term, marriage counseling also encourages both partners to focus on self-improvement and self-awareness. In couples therapy at Starpoint Counseling Center, a marriage counselor can help you to:

  1. Explore your hopes, expectations and relationship concerns
  2. Understand each other better
  3. Teach your effective ways to communication with each other
  4. Explain why there are differences of opinion & what to do about them
  5. Learn problem solving strategies
  6. Learn how to move on from marital disappointments and anger
  7. Understand the possible implications of a breakup

Starpoint Counseling Center is also aware of the fact that couples come to them reluctantly, but with a hope that it can benefit their marriage. A good counselor will make every effort to help the couple feel at ease and advise them as best as possible. We can schedule your appointment around your busy schedule. Call or text (813) 244-1251.  You can also reach us online: http://www.starpointcounselingtampa.com

Also see: http://www.starpointcounselingbrandon & http://www.affordablecounselingbrandon.com