Has anyone ever told you that you mean well but you come across as something different? Is there a certain group or type of person that tells you this? Then you may be giving off a vibe in your communications and are not aware of it.
We sometimes have women who come in and communicate differently to men than they do to women and they do not realize they are doing it. This is also true for some men as well towards women. It can be because they had a verbally abusive father, were traumatized by a man or physically abused by a man. This is also true for some men as well towards women.
When this happens the communication is negative and defensive thus breaking down any form of assertive communication that may exist.
If you feel this is happening to you then call Star Point Counseling Center at 813-244-1251 and set an appointment to see one of our therapists to help you work through your perceived communication.
“Troubled children are distanced, humiliated, and ashamed when they do something wrong and are often repeatedly blamed for something they did not do. Many of them have also learned how it feels to be blamed, over and over again, for something they did do wrong and to never be forgiven. They know how it feels to be forgotten, ignored, and abandoned.”
“Children who are repeatedly put down feel that everyone else is better and more lovable than they are. They begin to feel and believe that they will never fit in.”
“Our children need to know that they do belong, right here, with you and me.”
Black lives matter, I truly believe that and that everyone is equal. African Americans have had inequalities since slaves were brought to America to be bought and sold. The Emancipation Proclamation was suppose to free slaves, and it did. However, the inequalities did not stop. The Union had troops in the southern states after the civil war to enforce that slaves were indeed free, although inequalities were rampant. The presidential election of 1876 changed that. Republican Rutherford B. Hayes was the northern states nominee and Democrat Samuel J. Tilden was the southern states nominee. The election was disputed and that led to The Compromise of 1877. The democrats agreed to give the presidency to Rutherford B. Hayes and in exchange they had to withdraw the Union troops out of the south. With the Union troops gone from the southern states the white plantation owners did whatever the wanted to do to the black people and the authorities turned the cheek and pretended to not notice. This practice went on for almost 100 years until the civil rights movement in the 1960’s, much overdo at that point. If I was an African American living in the south from 1865 to 1965 I would gotten the heck out of there as soon as I could, why would they stay?
My concern is that the inequalities are focused on Black America and Black Lives Matter, which I totally agree, they do matter. But, how about the other ethnic groups in America? How about the Asian’s who helped build the railroads across our nation? How about the inequality right after Pearl Harbor when the U.S. Government rounded up as many Asians as they could find and put them in a barricaded area simply because of the way they looked. How about the Irish and Italian Immigrants who came to America from 1870 to 1925? They were the manual labor who helped build the industrialized cities with no labor laws and severe labor inequalities. How about the Hispanic immigrants who came to America in the last 50 years or so? They are feeling inequalities simply on a language barrier. How about the inequalities of women, they were treated as if they were stupid, weak and could not do anything except cook and clean. How about the current inequality on gay, lesbian and transgender people, the recent hate crimes in Orlando exposed the most recent inequality in America. How about the pre judgement and inequalities on Eastern Indian and Middle Eastern people in America after 9-11-2001? How about the biggest inequality of all, the American Native’s? They welcomes the white man from England, taught them how to survive only to have their entire nation stripped of them piece by piece, broken treaty after broken treaty and then cast into the desert.
So, with that being said, I think we, as Americans, should change Black Lives Matter to All Lives Matter.
Clarissa Crystal-Belle, LMHC has published her first book. Therapy in Action With Troubled Kids is now available in paperback in all of the bookstores and online for less than $15. This is a must read for anyone who works with children in schools, daycare, Department of Children and Families, Children Police Investigations, Foster Homes, Divorce and Custody Attorney’s and Parents. The book is not your ordinary self help book on how to raise children, it is very intuitive and insightful.
Clarissa Crystal-Belle, LMHC is Co Founder and Executive Clinical Director at Star Point Counseling Center. Clarissa has extensive experience working with children in corrections, DCF and with the court system. The book is based on her experiences working as a Therapist.
Please visit out web site starpointcounselingtampa.com to view Clarissa’s Bio.
Research is beginning to reveal that positive thinking is about much more than just being happy or displaying an upbeat attitude. Positive thoughts can actually create real value in your life and help you build skills that last much longer than a smile.
A positive person anticipates happiness, health and success, and believes he or she can overcome any obstacle and difficulty.
Positive thinking is not accepted by everyone. Some, consider it as nonsense, and scoff at people who follow it, but there is a growing number of people, who accept positive thinking as a fact, and believe in its effectiveness.
It seems that this subject is gaining popularity, as evidenced by the many books, lectures and courses about it.
To use it in your life, you need more than just to be aware of its existence. You need to adopt the attitude of positive thinking in everything you do.
If you feel you would benefit from positive thinking then call Star Point Counseling Center at 813-244-1251 to schedule an appointment to see one of our therapists.
Mind chatter is the endless, restless, stream of incomplete thoughts, anxieties and self talk which constantly pulses through our mind. In order to survive, our mind is always on, searching for possible threats, dangers and explanations. This is called our … Continue reading →
Suicide is an stealthy choice due to the lies that depression tells us. Individuals who are suffering from severe depression are lied to by their depression, it can tell that person, “Hey, you’d be better off dead. Life isn’t going to get any better.” And sadly, individuals sometimes listen. Even some of the most accomplished people such as Robin Williams. Depression doesn’t overlook those who are rich, famous, funny, or even loved by many.
Here are a few tips for beating depression:
Exercise. Physical exercise, even just at a low intensity for 30 minutes a day is known to lower depression. Exercise increases the activity level of important brain chemicals such as dopamine and serotonin which is the same neurochemical that popular drugs like Prozac and Zoloft target.
Social support. Hormones that are involved in bonding and helping behaviors are known to lower stress and anxiety. People who lack a supportive social network are faced with an increase in depression.
Sleep. Sleep deprivation after numerous days interferes with our ability to think clearly, it can even bring about serious health consequences. Disrupted sleep is one of the most powerful triggers of depression.
Suicide is a common symptom of severe, clinical depression. When depression is properly treated, the feelings of suicide often subside as the depression lifts.
“You will have bad times, but they will always wake you up to the stuff you weren’t paying attention to” -Robin Williams
Get the help that you need and deserve! Call us today to schedule an appointment. (813)244-1251