The ‘F’ Word: Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a voluntary and intentional process by which you have a change in feelings and attitude regarding an offense.

The rule is simply this: forgive. This is sincerely the best thing you can do in your marriage and really the only way to keep your marriage intact for the rest of your life. It takes letting go of negative emotions such as anger or vengefulness, and the ability to wish the offender well. Studies have shown that forgiveness inspires love and can be healing in many ways.

Use these tips to keep forgiveness at the heart of your marriage:

1.      Look at both sides of the story.

There are often simple explanations for frustrating behavior, but you have to be willing to see both sides. Too often, spouses jump to conclusions and immediately go into a blaming or defensive mode instead of looking reasonably at both sides of the story. If everyone looked at themselves first before attacking their partners, many fights would be dispersed before they even began. When you can view both sides honestly, it is easier to find forgiveness because you see what part you contributed in the fight.

2.      Practice a policy of open honesty, but not necessarily all the time.

Some spouses operate on the premise that honesty is the best policy no matter the circumstances. In reality, this is not true in marriage. When you hear that honesty is important in a marriage, it is. But it doesn’t mean cruelty or lack of tact is necessary. Honesty means not lying about how much you spent shopping and if your husband asks how you are, do not say ‘fine’ when you don’t mean it. If you need to, schedule a time each week that is your ‘honest’ time. When you have both had a chance to air your grievances, it will be easier to follow number 1 above.

3.      Imagine your spouse dying or leaving you.

This isn’t something that you usually hear recommended in a marriage. But it is a simple and powerful way to remind yourself of how much you love your spouse. When you are feeling especially angry, think about how you would feel if he or she died before you sorted out your feelings. Would this incident be of importance? This is not to say that you should pretend to be happy all the time because he or she might die. This is just another way to look at your marriage and realize how much you do love each other and want the marriage to go forward.

4.      Think about how forgiving will also help you.

Holding on to negative feelings and grudges is extra emotional weight you don’t need. You have likely upset your spouse at times too. There is  no way to exist in any long term relationship without some misunderstandings and doing unintentional harm. Forgiving will be freeing for you and is likely to bring you the same in return from your partner.

 

By following these simple guidelines, you will find that you can forgive your husband or wife more quickly. Throughout your relationship, you will frequently have moments of “rupture and repair.”  There are times you both go off course and will need to correct it. This is quite normal. Love always follows forgiveness. So, put these ideas into practice to strengthen your bond and ensure that you are truly together until death do you part.

At Star Point Counseling Center, there are two convenient locations for you to choose from in Brandon and Tampa. Call or Text us today, to schedule your appointment. (813) 244.1251
 To view the Brandon website, click here.

We provide counseling services to individuals, couples, families, children, teens, and adults with any type of crises.  We help you build tools as well as help design and implement individualized goals and objectives, help you sort out beliefs, thoughts, and behavior patterns that may be hindering you in your relationship(s) whether at the work place or in other areas of your life.  
 
We have the tools you need for managing pain, anxiety, disappointment, frustration, hopelessness, or anger resulting from circumstances that interfere in achieving a balanced and fulfilling lifestyle.  By working together, we will show you how to set and achieve goals and objectives therapeutically designed to meet your needs that will allow you to live the life you know that you deserve.

 

http://www.starpointcounselingtampa.com

http://www.starpointcounselingbrandon.com

http://www.affordablecounselingbrandon.com

 

 

 

 

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is Useful for: Depression, anxiety, eating disorders, mood disorders, phobias.

Based on the idea that we can make permanent changes in the way we behave by shifting our negative patterns of thinking, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT for short) is short-term and goal-oriented. The therapist and patient work together to identify the behaviors the patient wants to change and then come up with an action plan to do so.

What to Expect: Sessions are structured and the relationship with the therapist can be more “business-like” than in other kinds of therapy. In other words, the patient and therapist will work together to identify and change problematic patterns of thinking and behaving. The patient is given “homework,” which consists of keeping a record of his or her thoughts, feelings, and behaviors between sessions. At Starpoint Counseling Center, we have licensed and trained therapist that will work with you.

Term of Treatment: Four to seven months, with meetings every one to three weeks. Call or text us at Starpoint Counseling Center (813) 244-1251, to schedule your appointment.

Visit us on the web at:

http://www.starpointcounselingtampa.com

http://www.starpointcounselingbrandon.com

http://www.affordablecounselingbrandon.com

 

Are you depressed?

Understanding Depression

Depression is a serious, but common, illness: One in 10 adults report experiencing depression, and the condition is the most common cause of disability in the United States. The lifetime risk of any individual person becoming depressed is around 17 percent, and most people have their first bout of depression in their late teens or early twenties. The condition is slightly more common among women, but some researchers speculate that this may be because men are less likely to seek help or because their symptoms are more likely to manifest as anger than sadness.

Both environmental and physiological factors can cause depression. Most mental health experts now agree that brain chemistry plays a major role. The level of neurotransmitters such as dopamine and serotonin in the brain can affect a person’s risk of becoming depressed. However, life experiences affect brain chemistry, and some people become depressed after experiencing a trauma or stressful life change such as a separation or divorce, the death of a spouse, being laid off from a job, financial instability, relocation, or a decline in health. Everyday stressors, like social isolation, domestic violence, and the presence of other psychological conditions, can also contribute to depression. Sometimes depression arises as a defense mechanism in order to avoid experiencing painful emotions. Women who have recently given birth may struggle with postpartum depression in the days, weeks, or months following childbirth.

Depression’s symptoms are distinct from the symptoms associated with grief, when feeling emotionally overwhelmed is normal and temporary. Depression may be indicated when feelings of sadness and despair disrupt daily life and persist for more than two weeks.

Those who have experienced trauma or are prone to anxiety may be more likely to experience depression than those who have not, and research suggests that some people may be biologically predisposed to depression due to neurochemical abnormalities. A family history of depression can lead to a person’s inheriting or learning these traits.

If this sounds like you or someone you love, reach out to Starpoint Counseling Center. We have offices in Tampa and Brandon and can schedule your visit to speak with a therapist. Call or text us at (813) 244-1251

http://www.starpointcounselingtampa.com

http://www.starpointcounselingbrandon.com

http://www.affordablecounselingbrandon.com

 

 

Don’t Give Up on Love

Couples therapy can be used to treat issues both big and small. Or it can be used to enhance certain parts of your relationship. It doesn’t always require weekly visits or intensive psychotherapy where we dig into your childhood or highlight your skeletons in front of your significant other.

You are in charge of the process and that process is aligned with whatever goals you choose to focus on.

  • have a healthier relationship
  • cope with trust issues
  • overcome infidelity
  • better understand your partner through productive communication
  • accept your partner
  • learn how support each other
  • learn how to ask for support from each other
  • learn to share your lives productively and happily
  • improve quality time
  • learn to parent together
  • resolve conflicts
  • mediate a separation

Want to find out if you and your partner can benefit from Couples Counseling?

Call us today to schedule your couples counseling appointment: (813) 244-1251 or email us at: starpointcenter@aol.com

http://www.starpointcounselingtampa.com

http://www.starpointcounselingbrandon.com

http://www.affordablecounselingbrandon.com

 

 

 

What is Anxiety

All organisms have been given a fight or flight response mechanism that protects and preserves them. It is an adaptive function placed in us for the sole purpose of self-preservation. Anxiety, in a sense is an ally. When we experience a danger or a threat, the fight or flight response kicks in, adrenaline and other chemicals are activated and physical symptoms occur, rapid heart rate, palpitations, increase in blood pressure, etc. For most people these debilitating symptoms taper off and the body is restored back to it’s normal state. However, for some individuals, the adrenaline is not metabolized as easily and it may linger in the body longer. Hence, we need to look at anxiety as a physiological condition that needs behavioral adjusting, as opposed to a psychiatric illness.

starpointcounselingtampa.com

starpointcounselingbrandon.com

affordablecounselingbrandon.com

Star Point Counseling Center

The Forgotten Ones

“Troubled children are distanced, humiliated, and ashamed when they do something wrong and are often repeatedly blamed for something they did not do. Many of them have also learned how it feels to be blamed, over and over again, for something they did do wrong and to never be forgiven.  They know how it feels to be forgotten, ignored, and abandoned.”

“Children who are repeatedly put down feel that everyone else is better and more lovable than they are.  They begin to feel and believe that they will never fit in.”

“Our children need to know that they do belong, right here, with you and me.”

Therapy in Action With Insights and Strategies
for Anyone Living or Working With Troubled Kids

-C.S. Belle~LMHC

 

Find your copy here:

https://www.amazon.com/Therapy-Action-C-S-Belle/dp/1621833283/ref=sr_1_1_twi_pap_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1478730994&sr=8-1&keywords=therapy+in+action+with+insights+and+strategies

 

#Starpointcounselingcenter

813.244.1251

 

Memorial Day

Most of us have come to know Memorial Day as a day off from work to have a back yard BBQ or go to the beach.

Lest not forget!

Lest not forget the true heroes of America, the men and women who sacrificed their lives so we can enjoy the freedoms and lives that we live today.

Lest not forget the sacrifices the Fathers of our country made and the people who fought in the Revolutionary War and again in the War of 1812 and all of the wars up to today and the wars we are currently in against terrorism.

Lest not forget the men and women who have come back from war with mental health issues like PTSD, Depression and an inability to adapt back into society.

Lest not forget Pearl Harbor and The World Trade Center.

LEST NOT FORGET!