Why do we hurt the ones we love?

The people we know and love the most are the same people we’re most awful to in word and deed. Often times it is because we expect too much from them. We hope that they can help us, that they can do all the things we are not capable of doing; moreover, that they have to do them, because of the love we invest in them. When they don’t, we feel disappointed and the natural instinct is to get angry and act out. Also, the people we love and care for are the ones who have the courage to be honest and tell us the truth, even when it hurts. And even though we know it is the truth, it still hurts and the pain can cause violent reactions

Many times we expect the people we love to just know what we are thinking, and when that doesn’t happen, we feel misunderstood. We wish they could make a journey inside our head and see things the way we see them, just because we think it is the right way. We simply can’t understand why they think differently and how they can miss something that seems so simple and obvious to us. In addition, we misunderstand them because we’re not always willing to try to understand them.

We love them but in the same time we hate them because they know our weaknesses and there’s no way we can hide. The mask we wear in relation with other people is put aside and all the things we usually try to hide come to the surface

Lastly, We trust them and we know deep in our hearts that, no matter what we do, they won’t stop loving us. We feel safe to take our frustrations on them because we think there will be no consequences. We hurt them most of the times because they let us hurt them.

Advertisements

Standing your ground

Everyday, from the moment we wake up, we live our lives caring what other people think of us. We tip toe our way through life by doing things in order to please others, not because it’s what we believe in. Eventually our actions, appearances, and lives become molded by how we think other people perceive us.

Living a life that follows what other people think is a terrible way to live. We go through our days thinking about how other people might be judging us. But the truth is —  everyone is thinking the exact same thing, and everyone is too busy thinking about ourselves and our own shortcomings to worry about others.

It’s impossible to live up to everyone’s expectations. There will always be people ,  no matter what we say or how we treat them , that will judge us. You will never be able to stop people from judging you, but you can stop it from affecting you! Do not let other people’s perception of you effect your perception of yourself.

 

Living life according to “the plan”

“Life is what happens while you are making other plans.” ~John Lennon
       Getting fixated on plans will often times lead to disappointment. We tend to plan out our lives rigorously and not know what to do when things do not go as we anticipated. Sometimes you might need to make minor adjustments to your life plans in order to enjoy the journey of life. Other times, major changes might be necessary, either way, that’s your opportunity to experience all that this world has to offer.
     Learning to find joy and happiness with life’s surprises takes time, but you will no longer find yourself being constantly disappointed or stressed or looking around wondering what happened to the life you thought you’d have.
      You can develop the habit of seeing the good in everything, even when life doesn’t go according to “the plan.”
      If you are having a hard time coping with the changes in your life, at Star Point Counseling Center, we can help you. If you have any questions or wish to speak to a counselor please give us a call at (813)-244-1251

Family Stress

Family dynamics significantly impact one’s health in both positive and negative ways. Having a close-knit and supportive family provides emotional support, economic well-being, and increases overall health. Although, the opposite is also true. One’s health tends to be negatively affected by family stress and conflict. Families characterized by conflict, anger, and aggression have a particularly negative effect on the children in the home.

At Start Point Counseling Center, we can help you identify specific family dynamics that compromise the quality of home life for you and your children. We encourage strong, loving, high functioning, and spiritually grounded family lifestyles.

Without pointing the finger of blame, shame or chastisement, we work to identify the factors that may contribute to a breakdown in communication in the home. So, if you are experiencing tension and stress from your family dynamic please visit our website starpointcounselingtampa.com or give us a call at (813)-244-1251.

Grieving the loss of a loved one

Grieving is something that everyone endures at one point in their life. It is an individual experience that depends on someone’s personality, coping style, life experiences, and faith. The grieving process takes time and cannot be forces or hastened.

Here are some misconceptions are grieving:

  • The pain will go away faster if you ignore it.

Trying to ignore your pain or keep it from surfacing will only make it worse in the long run. For real healing it is necessary to face your grief and actively deal with it. This may be in the form of therapy and talking it out.

  • It’s important to be “be strong” in the face of loss.

Feeling sad, frightened, or lonely is a normal reaction to loss. Crying doesn’t mean you are weak. When grieving, it is important to be patient with yourself and allow the process to naturally unfold without holding yourself back, from fear or being “weak.”

  • Grief should last about a year only

There is no right or wrong time frame for grieving. How long it takes can differ from person to person. Some people start to feel better in weeks, while it takes others years to cope with their loss.

At Star Point Counseling Center, we have licensed counseling therapists available to help you get through the loss of a loved one. So, if you are having a problem coping with a loss and want to talk about it and learn ways to move forward please visit our website at  starpointcounselingtampa.com  or give us a call at (813)-244-1251.

 

Tips for social anxiety

Many people endure shyness, panic and anxiety even to the thought of having to meet or mingle with others. They will experience dry mouth, pounding heart, shaky voice, rapid breathing, sweating, blushing and an upset stomach. Because of this, they tend to avoid people all together. Here are some tips to help you if you are experiencing these symptoms:

  • Relax prepare yourself for whats to come and begin to think about the situation while in a relaxed state.
  • Seek out social situations actively put yourself in social situations so they will become “normal” and  not something that builds up dear anymore.
  • Ask questions social phobia has us worrying about what other people think about us. Cultivate curiosity and ask people open questions and interact with them.
  • Be yourself don’t be scared to “make a fool’ our of yourself or worry about being “perfect.” Just relax and be yourself!

At Star Point Counseling Center, we have licensed counseling therapists available to help you social anxiety. So, if you are having a problem interacting with people or going to new places and want to talk about it and learn ways to cope with your anxiety, please visit our websitestarpointcounselingtampa.com or give us a call at (813)-244-1251.

Lifestyle Factors That Improve Your Mental Health.

Mental Health illnesses are serious and real health issues that cannot be treated with lifestyle changes alone. Combining lifestyle changes and therapy can be more effective and help you see a more rapid change.

Check out some of these lifestyle changes that can affect your mental health!

Exercise/activity level: Exercise doesn’t just control your weight and improve your physical health, it can also give you protective benefits for your mental health. Some studies show that exercise can be just as beneficial as antidepressants. When you get the chance, take the stairs, go for a bike ride, or take the dog out for a walk around the neighborhood.

Smoking: Almost half of people with mental illness are smokers, and obviously we know that it’s bad for you. Even though quitting can be a challenge and may even yield a temporary downturn in your mental health, research shows that in just a few weeks after quitting it increases mental health. Smoking contributes to mood problems and physical problems such as heart disease, coughing, and difficulty exercising.

Diet: Unhealthy food choices such as excess processed foods, sweets, and foods with a low nutrient value can all undermine mental health. Research shows that healthy fats such as Omega-3 and Omega-6 fatty acids, as well as the fat found in fruits such as avocados, can boost brain power and improve your mood.

Social and community activities: Isolated people are more likely to struggle with mental health issues, and even a single outing a week with a friend can improve your mood for days. Getting involved in volunteer work can also help you feel more connected. The key is finding people you enjoy being around and who make you feel good about yourself.

Healthy romantic relationships: Research shows that a healthy romantic relationship can make a big difference on your mental health. Healthy romantic relationships have been shown to help people avoid anxiety and unstable personality traits.

Your lifestyle really does affect how you feel, you can become your own best mental health aide by taking the first step toward a healthy lifestyle. Not sure where to begin? Seek advice from a Mental Health Professional, they can give you additional suggestions based on your condition, lifestyle, and specific needs.

Call Star Point today to get started! (813)244-1251

We Accept Insurance!

Star Point Counseling Center accepts self-pay and major insurances such as United Behavioral Healthcare, United Health Care, Blue Cross Blue Shield, Cigna, and others. It would be in your best interest to contact your insurance company to inquire about your eligibility and benefits before scheduling an appointment with us. Some people prefer self pay as it gives them a higher degree of confidentiality.

Don’t have insurance? No worries! We provide a sliding scale based on your annual household income, this scale ranges from $40-$100 per hour session. There are Registered Interns or Mental Health Counselor Interns who you can see for a fee between $40-$60 per hour session. We also provide Life Coaching for individuals who are seeking advice and guidance with school, career, goals, etc.

Call us today or visit our website for more information about services, costs, and to schedule an appointment!

(813)244-1251, 813-479-3510 (after hours)

www.starpointcounselingtampa.com

Recognize Mental Health Problems In Your Child.

Mental-Health-Children

Mental health problems in children are common, real, and treatable. Without treatment there is an increased risk in behavioral problems at school, decline in grades, suicide, trouble with the criminal justice system, and more. With the help of teachers and other caregivers, parents can identify these problems early on and can determine whether or not help should be sought out for the child. 

If you recognize the following signs, then professional help may be needed: 

  • Decline in school performance
  • Poor grades in spite of strong efforts
  • Constantly worried or feeling anxious
  • Repeated refusal to go to school or to take part in normal activities
  • Hyperactivity or fidgeting
  • Persistent nightmares
  • Persistent disobedience or aggression
  • Frequent temper tantrums
  • Depression, sadness or irritability

If you suspect a problem, or just have questions and concerns contact us to see a Mental Health professional. (813)244-1251

Dealing With Depression?

Image

If you are affected by depression, you are not just sad or upset; you have a condition that involves intense feeling or persistent sadness, helplessness and hopelessness, together with physical problems such as loss of energy, and physical aches and pains. Depression is an illness and you need support to help fight it.

We are here to help, call us today! (813) 244-1251

http://www.starpointcounselingtampa.com/